Why do you do what you do?

“Your love, like a flower, must be nourished. There will come a great love and interdependence between you, for your love is a divine one. It is deep, inclusive, comprehensive. It is not like that association of the world which is misnamed love, but which is mostly physical attraction. When marriage is based on this only, the parties soon tire of each other. There is a break and a divorce, and a new, fresher physical attraction comes with another marriage which in turn may last only until it, too, becomes stale. The love of which the Lord speaks is not only physical attraction, but spiritual attraction as well. It is faith and confidence in, and understanding of, one another. It is a total partnership. It is companionship with common ideals and standards. It is unselfishness toward and sacrifice for one another. It is cleanliness of thought and action and faith in God and his program. It is parenthood in mortality ever looking toward godhood and creationship, and parenthood of spirits. It is vast, all-inclusive, and limitless. This kind of love never tires or wanes. It lives on through sickness and sorrow, through prosperity and privation, through accomplishment and disappointment, through time and eternity.” -President Spencer W. Kimball SM pg 140

It is so sad that the world has come to the point where marriage is a seen to be a benefit for self and not a team where you are there to benefit the other. Now it is almost like having a roommate so that rent is cheaper, or so that you get better tax discounts and cheaper health insurance. We need to move back to the reason you get married is because you love one another and you do not want in any way to hurt the other person and thus will do whatever you can to help them to be a better person.

Your an idiot...

“One of the hardest things to live with in any relationship is criticism, real or implied. Yet some husbands and wives demand sharply, “Why in the world did you do that?” or “I wouldn’t have done it that way!” or “We don’t do it that way where I come from!” or “That was a dumb thing to say.” Repeated criticisms of this negative and acid nature can wear away the bonds of love until the marital fabric is weakened and ruined—with sad results for both parties.” –Elder Robert D Wells SM pg 287

This quote brought to mind the whole attitude and social way of my extended family, all my life I have seen as they, mostly my uncles, tear down and make fun of everyone in both joking and serious times. It is something that I have kind of picked up and have done with my brothers and it is very hard for me to stop and restrain myself from doing the same thing. I hope to remove this criticizing nature from myself so that when I get married it will not be part of my marriage.

You are what you eat?

“Without a strong commitment to the Lord, an individual is more prone to have a low level of commitment to a spouse. Weak commitments to eternal covenants lead to losses of eternal consequence” – Elder Russell M Nelson SM pg 157

I really liked this quote because it reminded me of something that one of my mission companions had said. He said something along the lines that that which you hate the most or love the most is that which you become. It was something that he had noticed to a degree in some of the people that he had met. I have a testimony of it because he was that which he hated so much. And the funny part was that he would never admit it but he was. The reason that this quote goes so well with what my companion said is because we need to love the Lord with all of our hearts and because we love him so much we will began to have him as a focus in our thoughts and eventually take on his attributes of loving everybody so much. With a strong love and commitment to the Lord we are able to feel charity, the Christlike love that he feels for everyone. And most importantly we will feel it for our spouse.

To Do or not to Do

“I also invite the Latter-day Saints to look to the temple of the Lord as the great symbol of your membership. It is the deepest desire of my heart to have every member of the Church worthy to enter the temple. It would please the Lord if every adult member would be worthy of—and carry—a current temple recommend. The things that we must do and not do to be worthy of a temple recommend are the very things that ensure we will be happy as individuals and as families” -President Howard W. Hunter SM pg 314

I really loved this quote; especially the part where he says “the things that we must do.” This makes the temple recommend that much more important. Not only should it be based on what we don’t do but on what we must do. There are so many things overlooked by us members of the church, we see the commandments as restrictions and restraints and not so much as commandments. For example, the Word of Wisdom (D&C 89) most take to mean don’t drink smoke or do drugs. But it also gives us a strict diet that we should keep to. My brother is a cross country runner and the diet that he lives off of is no different than the diet that God has commanded us to have. It is a long distance diet. It is there to help us make it to the end and if we not only keep the commandments but do what we must then we will really be worthy of a temple recommend. My question is how many less people would be going to the temple if they were asked about things like this?

How to decide anything really.

“. . . I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right. But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you cannot write that which is sacred save it be given you from me.” (D&C 9:8–9.)

There are many different ways to know who it is that we are to marry and when it is that we are to do so, we should not rush these things and we should not proceed without the confirming answer that comes from our Father in Heaven through his gift to us, the Holy Spirit. And the examples that Elder McConkie gives us with his own marriage I believe to be very insightful. We should make the decision and then take it to the Lord for his approval.

Choose your Spouse

“Be worthy of the mate you choose. Respect him or her. Give encouragement to him or her. Love your companion with all your heart. This will be the most important decision of your life, the individual whom you marry.” –Pres Monson SM pg 188


This is so true. I believe that you should be all of these things because it is the most important decision of your life. You do need to be worthy and respect her. If you do not then you will not love and cherish her. If you don’t cherish her then you will never help her and your marriage will probably fail. I have seen it happen and it is not something that you want to put yourself, her or your children through.

True Love

“Love is giving all of yourself while expecting nothing in return.” – unknown

To truly understand what love is you need to actually have felt and done it. The closest that I have ever come to true love is the love that I feel for my family. I always hope and wish for their wellbeing and feel that I truly would drop everything at any given moment and rush to their aid. I just hope that if the need ever came up that I would actually do it. That is why I have only come close; love must be tested in order for it to be known. As of yet I have not had a test, I don’t particularly want one but knowing that it would teach me what it means to truly love my family I would accept it. I hope.

What is Perfection?

“We must have the courage to be imperfect while striving for perfection.” –pg 369

“Competition and jealousy and envy now begin to have no meaning. Just imagine the powerful spirit that would exist in our … society if we finally arrived at the point where, like our Savior, our real desire was to be counted as the least among our sisters (and brothers).” –Sister Patricia T Holland (Eternal Marriage SM pg 370)


I couldn’t help but stop and think when I got to both of these quotes of Sister Holland’s. They both made me want to be better. The first one talking about perfection is a problem that many face including myself. The need to be ok with being imperfect while striving for perfection is almost contradictory in statement and is something that is very hard to do. We have to drop pride and the belief that we are better. This in turn leads to the second quote. Pride is the cause of competition and jealousy and if we can get rid of it then we can hope and desire to be “counted as the least among our sisters” and brothers. To desire to not be the best would be humbling indeed and is something that I fall woefully short in and definitely need to work on. I would encourage you all to do search for times and opportunities through the day where you can be counted as least and to take advantage of it. I believe that that action will cause you to partake of the fruit of the spirit in a greater proportion and you will receive milk without price (see 2 Nephi 9:50).

What Men Can Do

“The second question: What more can a husband do to support his wife, the mother of their children? First, show extra appreciation and give more validation for what your wife does every day. Notice things and say thank you—often. Schedule some evenings together, just the two of you. Second, have a regular time to talk with your wife about each child’s needs and what you can do to help. Third, give your wife a “day away” now and then. Just take over the household and give your wife a break from her daily responsibilities. Taking over for a while will greatly enhance your appreciation of what your wife does. You may do a lot of lifting, twisting, and bending! Fourth, come home from work and take an active role with your family. Don’t put work, friends, or sports ahead of listening to, playing with, and teaching your children.” –Elder M. Russell Ballard (Daughters of God)


In discussing what can be done to help mothers Elder Ballard says the above. I completely agree and don’t feel the need to expound on it other than to say that it’s a shame that it doesn’t actually happen often enough.

Those who wait for the Lord

"The people of the Lord shall not be ashamed. For the people of the Lord are they who wait for him; for they still wait for the coming of the Messiah." - Jacob, 2 Nephi 6:13

I have probably read this scripture a dozen times and it never really struck me with anything of importance. But this last time that I read it I couldn't help but feel awe and wonder. I asked myself the question, "Do I wait for the Lord?" We all seem to go about our daily lives, living as if there is no end to come, we seek to recieve the glories of those around us and to increase our station in life. When was the last time we actually waited for the Lord to come. Maybe that is when He will come again the second time, when we are actually waiting for him. Right now when we are not waiting for him, it is like saying that we don't need him. Why would the Lord come to us when we reject even the fact that we need him. When we show the Lord that we want and need him by waiting for him then he will come to us in glory and power and deliver us from the powers of evil that beset us. Then we will be the people of the Lord, those who wait for the Lord.